Sunday, February 11, 2024

Shining Authentically

I'm going to get real honest in this post. I have felt a desire to do this for a while now because I really dislike the inauthenticity that makes up most of social media these days. I think we all know deep down that a majority of what we see is just for the camera, but it still makes us compare ourselves to what we are viewing. Just last week, I started to clean up accounts that I view and follow on Instagram and Facebook. I want to see people being their real selves! 

Today, I had a tarot reading from an online friend and was amazed to see how much it lined up with my current desire to be real with my friends & family. (She nailed the last two readings she has done for me as well!) 

What to focus on this year: Queen of Wands.
This is the year to stop caring about what people think of you. Truly confident in who you are. Don’t hide your enthusiasm or your true self, for fear of what people think. Learn to be comfortable with yourself. Become open to the possibilities that people might love you for exactly who you are. Shine authentically and without apology.

In addition, my natal horoscope had this to say tonight, "You will have to do something that you don’t normally do or that you’ve never done before. Do it—even if you struggle."

So, here we go ... I have ALWAYS been uncomfortable with who I am and have constantly worried about what others think of me ... but I hope things change this year. I want to finally just be me without worry for what others think. If people don't like the "real" me, then that's fine. I can live with that. 

I saw this on Instagram last month and it also spoke to me.
While things on my social media may look all peaches and cream, they are not. I have a LOT of medical conditions that have a big impact on my day-to-day functioning and mood. Some of you may know that I deal with these issues, but most people probably don't have a clue. I'm going to list them in the order of how long I've been dealing with each diagnosis. A ** indicates that I am taking medication or vitamins/supplements to help. (You should see the pile 'o pills I take morning and night! 😆)
  1. Hypothyroidism **
  2. Insulin resistance (I am not considered diabetic) **
  3. High cholesterol **
  4. Depression **
  5. Anemia **
  6. GERD (heartburn, reflux) **
  7. Food sensitivities which end up as rashes, hives, upset stomach (I do limit the suspected foods that give me issues even though skin testing & bloodwork for food allergies show ABSOLUTELY NOTHING!)
  8. Irritable bowel 
  9. Asthma
  10. Restless leg **
  11. Menopause - hot flashes, insomnia, night sweats, etc. **
  12. Chronic back & neck pain - I don't take anything for this, but see next note
  13. Possible fibromyalgia - the medicine that helps my back pain is often used for fibromyalgia, but I can't take it as it doesn't make me feel good during the day
  14. ADHD **
  15. Anxiety - I have had this most of my adult life, but didn't term it as anxiety
  16. Trigger finger - this just started a few weeks ago in a finger that I injured in a fall about 6 years ago!
Some days are good, some days are not and many are in between. I am lucky to have medical insurance to help pay for my care and medication. I have family who understands my feelings and moods and are patient with me on my bad days. I am very grateful that I am not dealing with cancer or some illness that has me in and out of the hospital. HOWEVER, that doesn't take away from the fact that this is my "battle" day in and day out and I often want it all to just go away so that I can feel "normal."

So, please know that, if you are dealing with chronic medical issues, I SEE YOU and I am here for you if you ever need an understanding ear, or need to vent/let off steam or whatever! I am happy to help you fight your battle 💕. 

Tuesday, January 30, 2024

Struggling through

Since I last posted, I've had stuff that I've wanted to share here but I honestly couldn't find the motivation to sit down and put a post together. 


Then I saw this graphic today and realized that there hasn't been much sunshine lately. There are so many things that I do like about the darkest months of winter, but I do need some sunshine now and then! Hopefully, I'll get some motivation back as the weather warms up in the coming months and the sun remembers to pop out and visit us a bit more!

My biggest struggle right now is working through a huge list of healthy habits that I need to get back to and make time for. I can honestly admit that I waste time each day that could be put towards establishing these habits. My plan is to work through this list one habit at a time and not try to do them all at once. Hopefully, by the end of the year, I'll be in a better place than I am now.

I was hoping to be exercising a bit by now as well, but that hasn't happened. I really want to just start lifting weights again as I can tell I've lost strength since I left Planet Fitness a year ago. I'm working through that now. I also know I need to get in some cardio for my heart health, too. But my main thought about all of this is "bleh ... don't wanna do it" ... just being honest.

So, sorry this isn't a very upbeat post ... but it is what is on my mind lately. I have a lot of "should do's" on my mind that are fighting with my energy and motivation levels. I guess we'll see who wins in the coming weeks LOL!